We are Daughters of Our Heavenly Father

We are daughters of our Heavenly Father, who loves us, and we love Him. We will stand as a witness of God at all times, and in all things, and in all places, as we strive to live the young women values, which are:

Faith

Divine Nature

Individual Worth

Knowledge

Choice and Accountability

Good Works

Integrity

and Virtue.

We believe as we come to accept and act upon these values, we will be prepared to strengthen home and family, make and keep sacred covenants, receive the ordinances of the Temple, and enjoy the blessings of exaltation.

This is the short, yet powerful theme of the beautiful young woman of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Every week, as we gather together in Christ’s name, we recite this promise, and yet again determine to become closer to our goal of becoming more like our Father in Heaven.

As these young women, ages 12 to 18, walk the streets of Orem, going to their various activities, and learning the lessons of life, they daily fulfill the words of our beloved Pres Hinckley, who stated “I have said many times that I believe we have the finest generation of young people that this Church has ever known. They are better educated; they are better motivated; they know the scriptures; they live the Word of Wisdom; they pay their tithing; they pray. They try to do the right thing. They are bright and able, clean and fresh, attractive and smart. These are very substantial in number. More of them go on missions than ever before. More of them marry in the temple. They know what the gospel is about, and they are trying to live it, looking to the Lord for His guidance and help.”

These young women are absolutely amazing! I cannot fully express the awe I feel when I see who they have made themselves to be, and what they have done in the name of the Lord.

As we welcome in new young women into our circles, I would like to more fully show you the beauty and strength of the theme which they will soon know as well as the back of their hand.

The foundation of young women’s is said in the very first line of our theme: “We are daughters of our Heavenly Father, who loves us, and we love Him.” Isn't this an absolutely wondrous statement? “He lives, my kind, wise heav'nly Friend. He lives and loves me to the end. He lives, and while he lives, I'll sing. He lives, my Prophet, Priest, and King.” The period of time during jr high and high school is one of the most difficult periods of time during a girl’s journey to womanhood. On every corner, she sees her self-value challenged, her high hopes are slighted, and she begins to find that holding to the high standards presented by the gospel are harder than they seemed in her childhood. But with the knowledge that she has a loving Father in Heaven, who will do all that He can to help her to come back, and support her through her trials, she will face life with confidence and a determination to come out of it a better person.

The next sentence says “We will stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things and in all places, as we strive to live the young women values.” This comes from Mosiah 18:9, which states: “Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that ye may be in, even until death, that ye may be redeemed of God, and be numbered with those of the first resurrection, that ye may have eternal life.” Made for young members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, the young women’s program is made to prepare the young women to become, not only joyful people in general, but women who the Lord can depend on to help Him to accomplish His work and glory. Through this program, they will be lights for good, impossible to ignore, and will guide many other girls to the joy of the gospel.

As the Young Women enter the program, they will be given a pamphlet called “Personal Progress.” In the pamphlet are 7 values which they will be mastering over the course of the 6 years in which they will be a part of the program.

The first of these values is Faith. In Alma 32:21 it reads: “Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore if ye have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true.” They will come to know that they truly are daughters of their Heavenly Father, who loves them. They will strive to achieve faith in His eternal plan, and know that it is centered on Jesus Christ, their Savior.

The second is Divine Nature. In 2 Peter 1:4-7, it reads: “Be partakers of the divine nature. … Giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; and to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; and to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity” As they work on mastering this value, they discover their divine qualities, and work to develop them.

The third is Individual Worth. In D&C 18:10, it reads: “Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God.” This value will help them to discover that they are of infinite worth, with their own divine mission. They will work towards fulfilling this mission.

The fourth value is Knowledge. In D&C 88:118, it reads: “Seek learning, even by study and also by faith.” Through mastering this value, they will continually seek opportunities for learning and for growth.

The fifth is Choice and Accountability. In Joshua 24:15, it reads: “Choose you this day whom ye will serve; … but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” This value encourages the young women to choose good over evil, as well as accept responsibility for their actions.

The sixth is Integrity. In Job 27:5, it reads: “Till I die I will not remove mine integrity from me.” The girls will come to have the moral courage to make their actions consistent with their knowledge of right and wrong.

The seventh, and final value is Virtue. In Proverbs 31:10, it reads: “Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies.” As the girls read the Book of Mormon and complete this value, they will prepare to enter the temple and will remain pure and worthy. Their thoughts and actions will be based on high moral standards.

To finish off the theme, there are four responsibilities which young women are preparing to fulfill.

The very first is to “strengthen home and family” -- a responsibility which they can start right now. All around us, the family is being attacked, pounded and torn at from all sides. Satan desperately seeks to destroy the strongest shelter and provider of strength and support, and these young women decide every week to act as an opposing force. At home, they are encouraged to befriend their siblings, respect their parents, and be ready to defend them in any situation.

The next is to “make and keep sacred covenants.” They are taught that everything points to the temple, and the covenants which are made there. Fewer and fewer marriages are lasting for all of eternity, and our girls are taught, not only to make this eternal covenant, but to keep it. They are taught the importance and infinite value of this covenant, and learn to look only for the men who deserve to join them in this eternal covenant.

As well as making and keeping these sacred covenants, they choose to receive and take action in all of the other ordinances of the temple.

Most important of all, the end goal of our visit to earth is to enjoy the blessings of exaltation.

As the girls recite this every week, standing strong with their spiritual and physical sisters, they grow closer together in unity, gain stronger testimonies, and gain a love for their God and for all men greater than they could ever have achieved on their own.

To wrap up, I’d like to read a quote given by Pres Hinckley, aimed at -- not only the young women -- but all women.

“Your hearts are all of one kind. You are gathered together because you love the Lord. You have a testimony and conviction concerning His living reality. You pray unto the Father in Jesus’ name. You understand the efficacy of prayer. You are wives and mothers. You are widows and single mothers carrying very heavy burdens. You are newly married women, and you are women who have not married. You are a vast concourse of women of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. You belong to this great organization, more than four million of you. No one can calculate the tremendous force for good that you can become. You are the keepers of the hearth. You are the managers of the home. ...I charge you to stand tall and be strong in defense of those great virtues which have been the backbone of our social progress. When you are united, your power is limitless. You can accomplish anything you wish to accomplish. And oh, how very, very great is the need for you in a world of crumbling values where the adversary seems so very much to be in control.”

I say these things in the sacred name of our Savior, Jesus Christ, Amen.

Analysis of Self-Sufficiency

“Over the years, Americans in particular have been all too willing to squander their hard-earned independence and freedom for the illusion of feeling safe under someone else's authority. The concept of self-sufficiency has been undermined in value over a scant few generations. The vast majority of the population seems to look down their noses upon self-reliance as some quaint dusty relic, entertained only by the hyperparanoid or those hopelessly incapable of fitting into mainstream society.” 

― Cody Lundin

     Sarah sang the National Anthem as she washed the dishes piling towers all around her. She clearly enjoyed the Harmony, and sang it even though there was no-one there to sing the melody. With her hair pulled back in her ever-present ponytail, she worked determinedly at her new project she had taken for herself -- that is, cleaning the entire mess of a kitchen. Now, usually, we are pretty good at keeping the kitchen clear and sanitary, but at this point in time, the kitchen was an absolute disaster.
     For this very reason, Sarah would have thrown a fit if our mother were to assign her the task of cleaning the entire kitchen. Clearly, the task was much too great for a 10 year old. And yet, when she saw that mother was stressed out, and needed help, she took the project on quietly and happily, singing as she worked. It was obvious as she worked for several hours that nothing would distract her from her purpose -- she would get the kitchen clean, no matter the price.
     As I observed her dedication, so different from the circumstances in which she was told to accomplish a difficult project, I came to the realization that this was a trait that I owned as well. I love the feeling of seeing a need, and then filling it with out any outside influence to do so. Frequently, when I am home alone, I will begin to clean, and then never stop until the house is spotless. When the family returns from their various activities, the reaction of relaxation and relief is immediate, and I feel absolutely wonderful!!! However, If the family were to leave, and my mother were to tell me that I must complete so and so chore before she returns, I often grudgingly accomplish this and nothing else. I only reach her expectations and no higher. When it comes to this kind of circumstance, Sarah and I enjoy doing projects which we have set for ourselves, but are inclined to rebel when required to accomplish it at the will of another.
     However, as I have studied more about this natural inclination of ours, I have discovered that it is not only Sarah and I that struggle with it. And it is not necessarily a general weakness. As I have read about America's gradual separation from Great Britain, I discovered that this tendency seems to be a trait of human nature -- able to be a strength or a weakness as the user is -- or is not -- able to control it.
     When Great Britain established the many extensive taxes on products such as sugar, tea, and stamps, America cried out in anger at the injustice of it. However, it was not because of the the actual taxes that they were required to pay. Instead they cried out against the fact that they had had no voice in the matter. "Taxation without Representation" was their cry, not "Taxation without Limits." If America had been allowed to be a part of setting the taxes, there would be no injustice felt by the colonists, and all would be well. However, they felt that they had a right to have their opinions and voices be a big part in the decisions which would affect them personally, and that this right was not being respected.
     So it seems that this desire for self-sufficiency can be a force for good or for evil, just like all other traits of our human nature. To find the balance can be complicated and hard to maintain -- and thus easier to let loose and not worry about it. But to accomplish the balance between selfish immaturity and a drive to do great things is to become one step closer to achieving self-mastery -- and that is a fine trait indeed. One that I place great value by, as it gives one power to accomplish one's visions and dreams.

He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still. — Lao-tzu

The Written Word

     Wow... I haven't written for a while!! But I guess I have a good excuse -- I've been busy nonstop since I last wrote. Life has a way of carrying me away sometimes... And sometimes it's really not pleasant. I'd wake up in the morning just as tired as I was when I went to bed, get everything done that day, and then look back on the day and think: "How come I feel like I haven't done anything today? I visited with a friend, spent time with family, read my scriptures... And yet I feel as though I am no farther along than I was before." I spent a week going through this cycle, and it stunk, let me tell you! Filling the day, and yet not filling the spirit is one way that really wears down my spirit. I have found that spending time on things like waiting to get an email, scrolling through facebook, or watching videos on youtube -- though sometimes just what I need for a quick pickup, more often just dull my life just a little bit more. I spend three hours babysitting the kids and making them a meal, and then get on the computer. Ten minutes later, I find that I don't feel any better, and it's time to move on to the next task.
     I was confused for a while -- this kind of rest is apparently satisfying to many people out there. And yet, although I was drawn to it with out a doubt, it was not in any way fulfilling. I have found this same feeling in other instances as well. One of them is when I hold a long text conversation with someone with whom I haven't conversed with face to face for a long time. During the text conversation, everything is relaxed, fun, and no problem. And yet, when I see them again, I feel as though it has still been forever since I have been exposed to their real self. This is the same with letters, emails, Facebook messages, etc. There seems to be something weird about having more contact through writing than through talking face to face. I couldn't figure this out for the longest time, and the wrongness of such relationships kept rubbing on me, making me feel raw and sensitive.
      The thing is, we are different when we write. I know that I don't talk the way I think. My words come out through a filter that past experience with society has taught me to hold in-between my mind and my mouth. But when I write, I am more able to illustrate what is going on in my head, as well as refine it and perfect it. Thus, when people read what I write, what they get to know as who I am is very much a part of me -- but at the same time, is not all of me. The way that I speak may be different from the way that I think, but it still is very much a part of me.
     Another reason why a relationship through writing is different, is that we process the words that we read with our head. We see the words, and if we forget what they said, then we can look again. We can analyze it, ponder it, memorize it, in such a way that is not usually done with the spoken word. When someone is conversing with me, I respond automatically -- not only with words of affirmation, such as "Yes," and "Uh-huh," but also nods, eye contact, smiles, etc. This is not done with the written word. We do not need to respond at once, and we also do not respond to their face.
     Is not this interesting? It is also interesting that the written word is so prominently used today. Emails, Texts, Chats, Messages... All of these are through writing. And yet, tell me which one is more appealing: A surprise visit from a friend who cares, or a surprise text from a person who cares? A deep conversation, or an email? A hug, or a like? A gift wrapped and delivered personally, or a gift card sent through the internet? For me, I would choose the former every time. But more and more often people use the written word seen with the eyes to communicate, rather than heard, seen and felt with the rest of the senses.
     I think this is what I was learning as I tried to depend on the internet to solve my problem of spiritual enlightenment and fulfillment. One day, I decided to go on a bike ride instead, and came back feeling absolutely amazing! Another time I went to the mall with some friends, and we had a marvelous time together. Another time I cleaned the house. Another time I went on a walk with my youngest siblings. The difference was immediate and amazing! Another example that I have found absolutely rejuvenating is Girl's Camp. During Girl's Camp, we spend all of our time working, talking, playing, and learning with girls who are there. There is no electronics providing quick communication with anyone in the world, only those around you. During this time the girls bond, strengthen their testimonies, and have their spirits filled to the very top. Youth Conference is very similar.

     Thoughts anyone? Why is the written word worse or better than spoken, physical communication? And why are compliments mean so much more when given to your face than when they're sent in a text?

Transitions

Do you know what I would like more than anything else right now? It's not a gift, or a friend, or anything like that. In fact... It's basically impossible.
I want to skip all transitions. Do you know how amazing that would be? I mean, to change your position from Point A to Point B immediately would be wonderful. Who enjoys transitioning from a fun, relaxed vacation with no expectations to a school year with a whole ton of expectations? It's a blink of an eye change, and our bodies and spirits don't change in the blink of an eye. The first couple of days are hard as we get accustomed to the schedule, the requirements and expectations, and the packs of homework are no fun. But as the school year progresses, we settle into the routine, we adjust, and soon the transition is over. We have just reached Point B!
However, this is only a very simple example of an uncomfortable transition. Right now, I am trying to transition from an unhealthy body to a healthy body, and it absolutely stinks!!! To make the transition, I need to abstain from all fruits, sugars, dairy, and grains. I need to drink at least 10 cups of water a day, and the bathroom has become my best friend. This will continue for about a month and a half, maybe more, as I cleanse my body from the toxins that have decided to move in. It has been absolute misery as my body begins to transition from craving these foods that feed the toxins. But as I get through each day, I am better able to avoid these foods. By the time the end of the cleanse rolls around, I will have no more toxins, and will no longer unhealthily crave these foods. I will have reached Point B.
I'm sure many people have felt the awful discomfort of the transitions between not exercising and exercising regularly, eating unhealthily and eating healthy, and many other habits which can be hard to break. It is, quite honestly, impossible to pleasantly appear {POOF} at Point B. However, Sometimes our wonderful subconscious seems to expect us to, anyways. Having moved several times, I am quite familiar with the taunting thought "All the other girls have WAY more friends than I do! They are all so familiar with each other!" Well, of course they have more friends than I do! I've just moved in. There's also the thought: "She runs 4 miles every morning, and look at me! I can't even run a mile!!" Again, she has been running for far longer than I have. She has already completed my transition, and is now working towards Point C.
These are all everyday examples of times when we beat ourselves up over expecting ourselves to do in a short amount of time what the experts took weeks, months, and years to accomplish.
One of the most prominent examples of this in my mind, is the period of time right after my dad had been arrested. I had gone into extreme shock as my family life blew up into the air and began to fall all around me. During this time I was staying with a relative, and I fell deep into depression. Every day was dark and hopeless, and many nights were filled with nightmares. I was at my lowest point. I was stuck at Point A, and Point B seemed to be an eternity away. There was no way I would ever reach it. The transition between deeply depressed and incapable and quite capable and loving life was surely too hard. But as those around me pushed me forward, step by step, lifting me out of the crevices and picking me up when I tripped -- even when I wanted nothing more then to stay down -- I began the transition. The transition between looking down at the ground and looking up at the sky. The transition between always lounging around disconsolately and doing a few chores around the house. The transition between always being watched for my personal safety, and being able to stay at home alone. All of these transitions were made, step by step, here a little and there a little, and I soon began to improve. Maybe it wasn't so impossible to be happy....
Since then, I have come a long way. I have learned many lessons and gained many skills, but even now I struggle with the emotions, paradigms, and trauma that I experienced during that time. I haven't reached Point B yet, though I am getting close. I've learned that beating myself up about messing up sometimes just keeps me from my destination and makes me slide backwards even more.
As I have talked with Bishops, Emotional Doctors, and Therapists, they have all repeated this same principle over and over again: that our course to our goal will not be one straight line. There will be bumps and trips, stupid mistakes, and relapses. But as we continually try to be better and learn from these mistakes, we will eventually reach our destination. One Bishop put it this way:

The Black line is the course from Point A to Point B -- in his case, Imperfection to Perfection. The Purple line is our path on that path -- and, as you can see, we barely spend any time on the actual course. But as we continually correct our course, we do eventually reach our destination. At the beginning of the transition, we waver from the path a lot, traveling very far from it. But every time we turn back towards the path, we come closer to our destination. And as we continually correct our course, the times when we leave the path become shorter and shorter, and we are able to head toward our destination faster and faster, until, finally, we reach our Point B.

So, really, there is no need for beating ourselves up over taking longer than we thought to transition from Point A to B. Many times, it will take much longer than the straight course. But, despite the hitches, determination will get us to the end. It may be hard to get there, and sometimes we can't see it. I know I didn't when I was in that ditch. But I did get there as I received help, and kept stepping forward. 

But still... Wouldn't it be nice to skip transitions?

“In the hero stories, the call to go on a journey takes the form of a loss, an error, a wound, an unexplainable longing, or a sense of a mission. When any of these happens to us, we are being summoned to make a transition. It will always mean leaving something behind,...The paradox here is that loss is a path to gain.” 

― David Richo

Shame

     I feel so... Cliche. So stereotypical. Yet again, I'm feeling the emotion that so many teens struggle with, the emotion that I had scoffed at so many times. It's the feeling of not having a place and a spot in society. It's the wondering where we get in. It's the question: "What makes me special and amazing?" And it's the question: "Am I special and amazing?"
     Why am I asking these questions? Why do I doubt my value to society?
     Because I, like so many others, know many people who are great. They aren't that rare. We know people who have accomplished amazing things, and people who have discovered -- for themselves -- great truths of both the past and the present. We know people who know a certain school subject better than the back of their hand, and we have heard of people who have earned millions through their expert management of property and ideas. There are millions of great people out there, all who seem to have found their place in society, and who seem to know just how to succeed.
     And then there is me, along with all of those others who sit and watch, who look on as they astound us again and again with their inherent gifts and talents. We see only their amazing successes and progression which they are accomplishing... and then we turn and look at ourselves.
     Honestly, there is no person better able to see and fully know my mistakes and weaknesses then I am. Who better to know the mistakes of the prisoner, then the prisoner himself? We look at ourselves and see all of our failures, and all of the gifts and talents that we have not been blessed with. We see all of the naive weaknesses that we hide from the rest of the world... And then we are ashamed. Ashamed of what we see ourselves to be, in comparison to with what we see others others to be. How can we possibly fit in with those who are great, knowing our past like we do? So we just sit, smoldering in our failures, becoming stale, and truly becoming that which we view ourselves as: a forever failure.

"We are shaped by our thoughts, we become what we think."

~Buddha 

     Shame. Ugh... it feels just awful. To listen to it is one of the most inhibiting things that I have experienced -- and I have experienced many. Listening to the pain of knowing that you just didn't play up is absolute misery. It leads to the "knowledge" that you have been unable, that you are unable, and that you always will be unable.

     Shame in itself is not an awful thing. When we feel shame we better understand the consequences of what we did. It's listening to it, accepting it as our own voice that creates an absolute monster. When we are under the influence of shame, listening to and obeying its voice, we hide our talents in the ground, and we keep ourselves from reaching our full potential. Shame was the voice I was listening to this morning, yesterday morning... and, quite frankly, for about three months now. 

     The truth is, these people are amazing. They took their talents which they had received and used them to create success and victory. There is no doubt about that. But the lie that I needed to refute was that I cannot do the very same -- succeed. During the time that my friends were writing and directing plays, memorizing the Declaration of Independence, and studying all of the religions deeply and thoroughly to discover that their religion was truly the full and complete one, I was going on a journey myself. I was trapped in a prison that many people cannot break out of for years and years... which many of my ancestors were not able to break out of and died still trapped. For these two years that my friends were accomplishing and succeeding marvelously, I was doing the same, breaking the walls around me, and leading my family to a life free from secrets and ugliness. The greatness of everyone is different -- to try and become the greatness of someone else is to smother your true light and bury your talent... and fail at someone else's success. 

     My greatness is to create beauty, hope, and optimism where there is ugliness, hopelessness, and pessimism. Someone once tried to make myself ugly, and failed miserably. Someone tried to crush my hope, and only made it stronger. Someone put pessimism in front of my eyes, and I pushed it away. I now know without a doubt that, no matter how ugly the circumstances, in time, beauty will preside. No matter how hopeless the circumstance, an answer and escape will come. And no matter how awful the future may be presented, I know that the highest good and glory will be accomplished. I am no more perfect then any of my friends, and I am no worse either. We are all rising, this generation of greatness, and God's will shall be done.

     So don't listen to shame. Take what it can give to you, and then leave. If you'd like to learn more about shame, Brene Brown has an amazing video on Youtube all about it. :) Here is the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=psN1DORYYV0

      "We are all wounded. But wounds are necessary for [Christ's] healing light to enter into our beings. Without wounds and failure and frustrations and defeats, there will be no opening for his brilliance to trickle in and invade our lives. Failures in life are courses with very high tuition fees, so I don't cut classes and miss my lessons: on humility, on patience, on hope, on asking others for help,on listening to God, on trying again and again and again." ~ Bo Sanchez, You Have the Power to Create Love: Take Another Step on the Simple Path to Happiness